The behavior problems we are seeing come from the inability to communicate the words they are feeling.
This is true in every facet of our player's lives.
As a coach I talk about the 3 most common areas that I see it.
On the field.
In the classroom.
In the community.
If we can teach them how to see it and say it, they will be able to overcome it.
Their ability to act differently comes from their awareness and articulation of the situation.
How about an example?
Let's say you are struggling to gain buy-in from your team as you lay the foundation of your vision. It starts with an understanding of what your individual players are seeing.
Hand them an index card, and a pen. Ask them to write down the top 3 issues facing your team. The obstacles they feel are in the way of progress. A few things are happening when you do this. Immediately they feel heard. They feel safe to think independently. They are opening up. They are pausing, so they can start to process what they are feeling. Once those words come to life on the card, they've taken the first step towards the actions you want to see.
The next step is having them share what they've written with the team. Whether it's you reading them, or each player, get the responses out in the open. Momentum builds as many of them will share the same responses. They will start to see how similar they are. The isolation some of them were feeling becomes a common ground that you, as their coach, can start building on.
At this point they have started to see it and say it.
Now you have a captive audience to help them overcome it.
This is when you share your vision. This is where you talk about your core values. This is where you tell them that every one of those obstacles can and will be overcome. All of this happens when individual opinion is sacrificed to the overall vision.
Take one obstacle at a time, and apply your vision and values to it. Show them how your foundation is strong enough to lift the temporary weight of the frustration they are carrying. When they start to see how you consistently return to your vision and values as your compass, they will see the value in following you.
Does it mean the process will always be neat, easy, and clear? No. There will be good days, and bad days. But every day lived in consistency, is a day closer to the buy-in you've been wanting.
Help them see it.
Let them say it.
Watch them overcome it.
As they buy-in to your vision because of it.
That's how a culture of success grows.
One obstacle cleared at a time.